u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
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