Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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