i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
