It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize