Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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