He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
