I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
