no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
So many bounce houses so little time
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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