You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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