dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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