please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
