I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
