Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
