I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
