I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I am one with the molecules
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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