Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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