she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
