Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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