For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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