Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
People with herpes should wear stickers.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Everything about him screamed your future.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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