In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
