Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
