Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
