hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
