I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
