Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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