Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
