I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
