I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You're like the curious george of whores
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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