My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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