I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
