she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
