Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
The adults are the big ones right?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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