"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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