So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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