Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
