I heard we made out
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
