You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
