we have officially lost it.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
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