ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
you will always have a special place in my vag
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
