16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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