Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize