I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize