Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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