That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize