"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
