I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
