I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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