Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
