Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
