I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize