I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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